It’s Tuesday but this is no normal Chelsea, I’m in hell and I want to share my pain with you!
You see, on this particular Tuesday, and the next as it happens, I’m in a location I’d never have believed I’d find myself in.
I’m in the Caribbean, Montego Bay Jamaica to be precise.
I’m sat on my hotel balcony having spent the last three hours relaxing on the beach, watching the crystal blue waters lap up the white sandy beach and time passing time in a way I’d never have thought possible when, in my early days my whole life revolved around sex and rugs and rock and roll, with the drugs bit being my fixation of following Chelsea all over the country.
But, I’m not here purely on vacation, I’m here to attend my sons’ wedding.
This Thursday he and his wife to be will exchange their marital vows on a pier jutting out into the Caribbean Sea; with that same crystal clear blue waters, I mentioned previously, rolling gently onto the beach.
Now that’s a far cry from a wet and windy midweek night following Chelsea to some distant northern footballing outpost where the natives’ sole intention was to physically assault you and do your health some serious damage.
Here, on this idyllic island, where everything in our five-star hotel complex is paid for and your every whim is catered for, you might be wondering why the opening gambit mentioned it as being hell.
Well, I’ll explain.
This Saturday, Chelsea entertain Manchester United, at Stamford Bridge, the Chelsea support will be hoping that their side can inflict a bit more misery on Jose Mourinho, it’s a fixture I look forward to every year, as do most blues.
But, with the kick-off set for 12:30, it does me no favours at all, it means that I’ll, after a Friday night on the cocktails I’ll have to climb out of my pit at 06:00 in order to make my way to the Sports Bar to watch the game.
I told you this vision of paradise has a darker side, purgatory I call it!