Date: 7th February 2018 at 4:15pm
Written by:


The Pride of London`s George Perry is my brother-from-another-mother. The nicer brother, of course.

His piece today, ‘Chelsea want world-class managers willing to work under tin-pot conditions`, beautifully, deliciously articulates what most true Blues are thinking.

It`s too perfect not to reprint large chunks here:

“Imagine writing the job posting for Chelsea FC`s first team head coach on Indeed or Linkedin. Qualifications: Minimum five-years management ina “big five” league and/or top 25 national team. Multiple domestic league titles and cups, Champions League title preferred. Experience working with players nominated for FIFA Player of the Year or Ballon D`Or, as well as developing in-house youth talent. Impeccable media savvy and charisma.”

Fair enough. A pretty concise summary of what CFC look for in a manager. But Perry goes on:

“Then you get to the job`s conditions and expectations: Minimal, non-binding input in transfer decisions. Must win at least one trophy in second year, no credit given for anything won in first year. Club management will side with players in disputes. Hostile press.”

Despite this, Perry actually goes on to give CFC upper management far more credit than I do (I told you he`s the nicer brother).

He says that Chelsea do not recognize this conflict. I disagree. They know exactly what they’re doing.

This is great, though: Perry says that Chelsea“want to hire coaches that would otherwise work for Bayern Munich, Real Madrid, Barcelona and PSG, while treating them like the latest sap waiting to be replaced by Sam Allardyce.”

LOL – because it`s so true!

George then goes on to make the key point that Chelsea are so arrogant that they believe they have the pick of the world`s best managers, but they don’t want to hire those men as managers!

They want to hire coaches with zero influence beyond the pitch – don’t forget, until Mourinho threw him out, Roman Abramovich was a fixture in the dressing room! (Of course, shortly afterwards, Mr A threw Mourinho out.)

Perry continues:

“World-class managers are not relegation-zone escape artists. They do not earn their reputations by quickly installing off-the-shelf methods to stem a decline and win selective points. They are world-class because they have a vision beyond this next run of games?”

“They recognize immense potential in anonymous young talent, and shepherd those players along until they break out on the world`s stage. They look at their academy and academies around the world and can describe what a Champions League-winning team will look like in five years. Then they explain how they will ensure that they are that Champions League team in five years, building off the victory last year.”

“These descriptions say as much about the club as about the man. Carlo Ancelotti, Pep Guardiola, Marcello Lippi and Sir Alex Ferguson are who they are because Milan, Bayern, Barca, Juve and Man United are who they are.”

Like me and most true Blues, George Perry believes that Antonio Conte has the talent and the drive to do all these things, “But not if Chelsea have their say in it.”

“Chelsea want world-class managers while doing none of the things necessary to cultivate world-class managers.”

Perry believes that Chelsea aren’t even doing the necessary to attract the Enriques and Tuchels of this world who can find much better jobs than the one at Stamford Bridge.

I`m not sure Abramovich has no chance in hiring them. I think Perry underestimates the draw of the rouble and the pig-headed arrogance of top Alpha-males who believe nothing can stop them achieving what they wish.

I believe that Abramovich has maybe one more go – tops – at getting the top manager he wants – which will be followed by the inevitable Groundhog Day routine of optimism-success-bewilderment at being undermined-failure-firing.

The one important element that I believe George Perry misses is why?!

Why are Chelsea coaches treated in this bizarrely unique fashion? Why are they expected to be coaches rather than managers?

Few have gone over this time and time again as I have. To the point where there is only one answer that fits or makes sense.

The reason that a Chelsea manager can only be a coach, is because Chelsea already have a manager.

His name is Roman Abramovich. It`s his club, his toy, and he enjoys playing with it.

Anybody who believes that he doesn`t have Hazard, Fabregas, Azpilicueta, Cahill, Luiz and Courtios on speed-dial and vice versa is beyond naïve. (Any journo like the Telegraph’s Matt Law, who writes that players don’t have contact with Abramovich is at the very least a very bad, naïve reporter or spreading CFC board PR.) That`s why what always kills the manager in the end is “losing the dressing room” aka one of the above pet players calling the real boss, Mr A, and whining that the training is getting a bit brutal/I`m not getting enough playing time/we don’t need this new top signing – every single bit of which renders Conte`s job totally and utterly impossible.

Just one of those areas is enough to illustrate how impossible is the manager`s job at CFC: Conte has wanted four or five top players since he`s been here; instead he`s gotten two, Kante and Morata.

On top of that he has had foisted on him seven or eight second-tier players, additions at which he himself confesses befuddlement.

What this means in games like Bournemouth and Watford and Burnley and Palace is that, not only does he not have the right players, but the players he does have know there is going to be no real competition for their places so they needn`t bust a gut.

It`s toxic, it`s disgusting, it`s no way to treat world-class human beings.

Run, Luis Enrique, run!


 

70 Replies to “Run, Luis Enrique! Run!”

  • This is more than just alpha male syndrome. (football managers are alpha males) It’s sociopathic behavior. And by psychological definition, sociopathy is an incurable condition. You don’t associate with them, unless you love being abused, with no hope of a different outcome. EVER.

  • The other story doing the rounds today, is that John Terry will be appointed manager at the end of the season. Well its an easy 10 mil for a seasons work, getting fired by CFC actually enhances a managers resume .Don’t ask for any players, or Marina will find the cheapest injured version of what you actually want . And when you have a bad patch, your Captain, instead of issuing a rallying cry,can be found crying to the media about losing his England spot .

  • Say what you w an t stans. But with the player we have, we hsshould not be beaten blue black by bournemoth and watford

  • Yep, we’ve heard that story before, too. Great managers end up getting beaten by relegation zoners. Must be manager’s fault. They must all come from the same factory.

  • Yes they should have, dwonder. They should have beaten Palace and Burnley too. But with no great competition inside the club to get players working hard against minnows, they clearly can’t be bothered with necessary energy needed to put down buzzy little clubs which operate on nothing but energy. Managers of those teams get paid too – as do the players. They’re professionals and they look at film. They know that getting at Chelsea gets them uncomfortable. JC

  • Aha….Of course the Nigerian snake is still at fault….He’s left but he appointed another English Anaconda who is completely derailing the coach. Yup the guy/group who never recruited from the serie A is now filling the squad with serie A junk…..Yasssss!!!!!!!

  • @ Joe we did not get beaten back to back quite heavily by those buzzy little clubs. Yes we lost but not scandalously. Watford and Bournemoth old have had 5 or 6. We were utterly shambolic. What it Roman that sent Rlc away, Pasalic, told challah he can’t guarantee gametime. Benched Ake for half a season.? Or Maria. The coach asked for a CF the club gt him one. He sat him on the bench. Tell me exactly what baka and drinky offer s th is club that Rlc and chalobah can’t. Add musonda and Kennedy into the mix. Bottom libe is this…. The club cannot to spend silly money on players again. You got to make do of what you have nd feekiiing use the youth players to augment. That is the deal. DEAL WITH it. Whether as fan or coach. If you cant deal with the heat, get the feeck of the bloody kitchen

  • lol Dwonder I would expect our team to beat the teams if our squad and transfers are as good as you guys say, that’s the thing though the teams you describe shouldn’t require some genius out of this world tactics from our coach. We are talking about the bottom feeders here not Barcelona, not to mention tactics are more or less the same ones coach used before, but actually with new board acquisitions like Baka.

  • Dwonder I also have a question about your expectations which is clearly not the best player per player quality wise in one of the toughest leagues in the world. We won the title last season and this season are still top 4 and in the CL and FA. All you anti Conte crowd, are you just glory hunters who expect titles every season? A few losses to the bottom feeders is enough for you guys to turn on him and hope he gets fired? I now see why people use the word plastics. Personally i am glad Conte is as vocal as he is. Certain fans and RA have these extreme expectations yet are totally fine with our current transfer model.

  • A question about your expectations for our squad which is clearly not the best quality player per player wise in the toughest league in the world*

  • Wow… The cluelessness that abounds here, sometimes. If a manager is under pressure to win trophies, how is he going to guarantee a youngster playing time? If it’s a multi-million pound manager, over a million pound kid, who do you think is going to get priority, from a business standpoint? Ultimately, the owner wants a trophy. Why would he want to play inexperience? Of course, he might buy into the idea for awhile, but as soon as it’s squeaky bum time, idealism is out the window. If you told me that my job was on the line, and I had to meet a certain objective, of course, I’d take whatever option gave me the best odds. Otherwise, I’d be horrible at my job. It’s a damned if you do, and damned if you don’t, proposition. All of that said, I’m still 100% in favor of giving youth a chance, but you clearly haven’t been watching very long, if you think that’s realistic at CFC. Conte has been one of the best in recent times, at playing youth. But make no mistake… He’s beholden to Dear Leader. He made a deal with the Devil.

  • It?s a good question, we want to integrate the youth, we want the coach to shut his mouth and work with what he has at his disposal, yet he should be fired for not even having a ?bad season? per say after literally just winning the season prior. The propaganda is that those who want better signings are the unreasonable glory hunters, I say it?s the other way around as I can?t even be mad at the coach for going trophy less with what he was given. I don?t get it Dwonder what would have saved Conte this season for you? Winning the title again?

  • Wow Pavel! You only just understood why they call us plastics??? LOL! You can see it throughout these comment pages – and we haven’t even got worst on this stream. Supporting team is not playing a video game. It’s real. It’s flesh and blood, it’s the smell of grass and the sound of effort and class, it’s buying-in to humanity at its most raw. There’s SO MUCH MORE to it than just winning. Just winning isn’t human. That’s why supporting CFC is increasingly a plastic experience with some impersonal rich bloke up high sticking on and flicking off personnel whenever he feels like it. It’s very very hard for a proper football fan to enjoy. And only plastics – and plastics alone – would want more of the same.

  • Seriously, win the league one season and then follow up with being top 4 and still in the CL mid season, and now apparently you are inept and are on the brink of losing your job due to a rough patch with some losses to some minor teams. Sprinkle in the fact having a limited squad, injuries, transfer flops bought by the board, and this takes plastic glory hunting to a whole new low.

  • Yet another piece of crap. Let me ask again-what does a manager have to do to have a say in transfers? Alonso, Morata, Rudiger, Zappacosta, Emerson all have Italian serie A in their DNA, including sandro, dzeko and llorente we almost got, i wonder if it was Avram Grant that recommended the lots. we rarely buy players from serie A but since our italian manager came on board, we have consistently raided the seria A. If Mr Conte and his apologists want us to spend crazy money on grandpas like chielini, bonucci, dzeko et al before they are happy then am sorry,they should look elsewhere. No club gets 100% of its transfer targets, Mr Conte and his apologists cannot also moan on transfer matters because the last time i checked he forced/endorsed the departures of Costa, Chalobah, Ake And RLC.

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